In 2013, my husband was living in Germany and I was in Virginia when I got the brilliant plan to invest in a house. It seemed like the right timing but I knew that I did not want to live in house alone with our young daughter until he came home so I decided that we would buy a house large enough for my parents to move in with us and when he returned we would purchase another house for just our small family. Fast forward to 2017 and we are still smushed under one roof only now there are 2 more dogs, 1 more baby, and my loving husband is home. We thought about another house but having built-in babysitters and my mother’s cooking has been a real asset; we never really put too much thought into it. It was still a plan though.
A few months ago, my husband and I started to act on our long desired plan to move into the city, out of the country so that I could have dependable internet for my office, I would not have to drive as far everyday, and we could have a place of our own. We spent a few months looking for homes and never really found a “home”, a lot of houses but no HOME.
I was speaking with a mentor about the subject and he asked me what I wanted. I explained the amount of bedrooms, baths, granite countertops, fireplace, etc. and he stopped me.
“No Bunny, what is it that you want from this move. Why are you doing it? What do you want when you settle in at night from this transition?”
Ahhhhh my magic wand question was being used on me…
I explained that I wanted to be able to have time with my family, I wanted to be able to see clients while my daughter was in school, a place to grow our family, leave the doors unlocked, fresh air, and lots of space, no Homeowner’s Association, to be close to stores if I need it and most importantly a great childhood for my girls.
He then asked what I enjoyed most about my child hood. Without hesitation I stated that all of my aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents lived about 10 minutes away. I fondly remember spending a lot of time with my grandparents growing up and that was due to their proximity to pick me up from school and practices. They were my best friends.
Then there was silence on the other line.
I realized in that moment that what I was searching for, I already had.
I spoke to my husband about it and decided that what we wanted was our own space. If we moved into the city even though I would be checking some of my boxes, I would be driving a lot more to achieve what was MOST important to me and I would have hardly no time with clients due to the location of my daughter’s school.
So we made a huge choice. We would stay in the country.
I then made the real list. The one not filled with things but filled with desires and non- negotiable items. Time with my parents was the top priority. Towards the bottom was the fact that I actually despise moving but how could I pull off that one if we wanted more space?
The house next to our current house has been abandoned for a few years. It is enclosed in woods and I did not like that it had no sunlight, the people who were there last smoked and I could smell it in the paint. I knew I did not want to live there.
Here is the important part.
By knowing what I TRULY wanted and what I would NOT sacrifice. The answer became clear. We would buy the house next door. But we would not be moving into it. We would be moving my parents into it.
See the perfection?
We accomplish my most important thing: the kids get a terrific childhood close to their grandparents, I do not have to drive as much as if we had moved to the city, we could grow our family, leave the doors unlocked, fresh air, lots of space, no HOA, see clients from my CURRENT office on our property, and best of all…I did not even need to pack one box….And eventually the drones will deliver groceries right?
This is the perfection of not only having a plan but having someone to go through it with you, challenge you, hold you accountable to what you truly desire, ask you the hard questions, and when you get it down, celebrate with you. It is not easy but it is so worth it. See you all at the house warming!
Bunny Sumner Young enjoys sharing insights into professional experiences and personal encounters to support change, empower leaders, and create a positive outlook in our world. She provides professional speaking for conferences, workshops, motivational seminars, and classes. Visit the Contact Page to request a list of current speaking topics and selections.